I've decided I need to be more open as far as family planning options go. For as long as I can remember I've wanted to have 2 or 3 children of my own. That was it...the only way to be complete. In light of the current circumstances, I've realized I need to widen the path to contentedness. Of course another baby will always be welcome in our family, but I need to be open to the other possibilities: adoption and happily raising an only child are the ones that immediately come to mind. I need to find peace with the only child scenario and if God leads us to adopt, or blesses us with another biological baby that's something we can deal with at the time.
I've started reading a book by Susan Newman called, The Joys and Challenges of Raising Your One and Only: Parenting an Only Child. I have to admit, after looking only at the negative things about having an only child, it is refreshing to read about the many positive and beneficial aspects to it, both for parents and child. It gives me a whole new perspective and is very encouraging.
I'm finding several of the traits common to only children are already present in G. He has an "increased and advanced vocabulary" simply due to the fact that he is surrounded primarily by adult conversation. We take the time to explain things to him and talk things out more, so he is learning more about reasoning. He also shows leadership qualities and creativity.
It is interesting to me to learn that only children actually have a slight academic advantage as well as an income advantage later in life. They are generally better-adjusted to adult life and have a high self-esteem. All of these things can be attributed to the special, undivided attention they receive growing up. Parent-child relationships are often very close as well. And hey, they don't have to deal with sibling rivalry or parental favortism.
I am so glad that I am taking the time to explore this point of view. It is really helping me to see that G won't be maimed for life if he doesn't have a sibling, and in many ways, he will actually be better off.
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