1st Grade: Week 18 Highlights

We eased into this week, and had a great one. It helped that our history, Bible and reading all coincided this week, and we were able to kill 3 birds with one stone, thereby shortening our school day and allowing us to be done by noon every day (not bad at all considering we start working between 9 and 10am). Woo hoo!! We were also able to do a couple of fun projects to go along with our studies. We finally finished our Egyptian burial mask this week:

We also weaved a Moses basket to go along with our history and Bible lesson for this week:

"Rupert" took on two spelling lists this week and got them all right on his test. We practiced spelling the words out loud during practice times, and that seems to really work for him. Again, I don't know why I didn't figure this out before. He is an AUDITORY learner. Gotta get that through my head! :-)

Math: We started on one of his new workbooks this week, and so far he has done 16 pages! He loves it! It's mostly below his level, but there are some things that are fairly new to him (like telling time), and some that are just good review (like counting money and using tally marks). I've been giving him a sticker to put on each completed page, and he seems to really like that. I also think I'm going to reward him with an ice cream trip or something when he finishes the workbook. What? I like ice cream! Ahhhhh...keeping math fun...for both of us! :-)

Science: This week we talked about turtles and crocodiles and watched a Bill Nye video on reptiles. I've also resolved to do more science experiments. This kid LOVES experiments and I've been slacking. I've decided to do experiments even if they have nothing to do with what we're studying at the moment...just for the pure fun of it! This week we grew crystal flowers!

Social: Another resolution of mine is to put more effort into setting up regular playdates for "Rupert". Being an only child, he is desperate for someone to play with, and the brutal reality is that mommy just doesn't WANT to pretend she's a kitty all day. There really are some things that kids are just better at than adults. We have one regular playdate set up, and have plans in the works for at least one more. Two playdates a week and the flexibility to join in on other miscellaneous social activities should fill the need just fine.

Only Child Stereotypes

I had my first two encounters with peoples' only child preconceptions yesterday and today. They both happened at the dentist's office. First, after I declined a second set of x-rays for the year for G-man, the dentist asked if he was an only child. After I told him that he was, he made some comment on how mommy is protective of her only child. So....what, people with more than one child don't care about them and just let the dentist do whatever he wants to them?

Then today, we went back to the dentist for my turn. G-man was talking to the hygienist and she asked him if he had any brothers or sisters. When he said that he didn't, she immediately asked if he was spoiled. And so it starts, I guess. Now I just have to keep up on my job and raise an only child who is not a spoiled brat.

A New Attitude

The past week has been a great one! It's like I've had a revelation, a new breakthrough in my struggle with infertility. I feel great about my family as it is. Reading these books on parenting only children has really given me a new perspective and a much needed attitude adjustment. I'm so happy with our little family the way we are and the only way I want it to change is if it is God's will. I'm feeling contentedness wash over me and it's a great feeling. I'm looking forward to using my mental energy to build myself and others up instead of dwelling on what I can not do. I want to invest that energy into my marriage and my role as a mother.

I've been reading Parenting an Only Child: The Joys and Challenges of Raising Your One and Only by Susan Newman and The Only Child: Being One, Loving One, Understanding One, Raising One by Darrell Sifford.

Notes on Raising an Only Child

1) Teach the joy of serving others. The world does not revolve around the only child.

2) Teach them not to expect to always get their way.

3) Define acceptable behavior and be strict about it: interrupting, using manners, picking up after themselves,

4) Don't do for the child what he can do for himself. "The expectation that things will be done for you can carry over into adulthood and marriage."

5) Don't always be available for his entertainment. He needs to learn to entertain himself.

6) Don't give him everything he wants. Make him work and save for a special purchase.

7) Do not weaken once you have taken a stand: one more story, 5 more minutes, etc.

Only Children Can Do Great Things

I've decided I need to be more open as far as family planning options go. For as long as I can remember I've wanted to have 2 or 3 children of my own. That was it...the only way to be complete. In light of the current circumstances, I've realized I need to widen the path to contentedness. Of course another baby will always be welcome in our family, but I need to be open to the other possibilities: adoption and happily raising an only child are the ones that immediately come to mind. I need to find peace with the only child scenario and if God leads us to adopt, or blesses us with another biological baby that's something we can deal with at the time.

I've started reading a book by Susan Newman called, The Joys and Challenges of Raising Your One and Only: Parenting an Only Child. I have to admit, after looking only at the negative things about having an only child, it is refreshing to read about the many positive and beneficial aspects to it, both for parents and child. It gives me a whole new perspective and is very encouraging.

I'm finding several of the traits common to only children are already present in G. He has an "increased and advanced vocabulary" simply due to the fact that he is surrounded primarily by adult conversation. We take the time to explain things to him and talk things out more, so he is learning more about reasoning. He also shows leadership qualities and creativity.

It is interesting to me to learn that only children actually have a slight academic advantage as well as an income advantage later in life. They are generally better-adjusted to adult life and have a high self-esteem. All of these things can be attributed to the special, undivided attention they receive growing up. Parent-child relationships are often very close as well. And hey, they don't have to deal with sibling rivalry or parental favortism.

I am so glad that I am taking the time to explore this point of view. It is really helping me to see that G won't be maimed for life if he doesn't have a sibling, and in many ways, he will actually be better off.